Somebody left a glass of milk next to the keyboard. Reaction?

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Optimist: The glass is half full. Pessimist: The glass is half empty. Futurist: The milk's in the wrong half of the glass. Pascal programmers: Well, what type of milk is it? C Programmers: No thanks; I drink straight from the jug. Assembly programmers: No thanks; I drink straight from the cow. Basic programmers: No thanks; I'm still breast feeding. MIS: I'LL DRINK IT IF YOU CAN GIVE ME UNTIL NEXT YEAR. Fuzzy logic guys: I may or may not have drunk some part of that milk. Prolog programmers: I know I drank it - just don't ask me how. Non-procedural language programmers: I drank it when nobody was looking. UI designers: What's that crap in my glass? Pentium users: I drank Glass * .49999999 . . . but don't hold me to that. Windows users: Where's my straw? Mac users: Where's my pump? UNIX users: Nahh . . . too easy. Multimedia author: Shareware game author: That glass is free; the next one you have to pay for. Security consultant: Where'd the rest of the milk go? CIA: What makes you think that's milk? NSA: We know what it really is. Copy protection crazies: Somebody drank half my milk and didn't pay for it! Free Software Foundation: That milk is the cow's contribution to all mankind! Schroedinger: That damned cat got into the milk again! Bill Gates: Not enough market share to be Microsoft Milk. Apple Computer: You guys really oughta be drinking Perrier. IBM: Rent the glass from us and we'll fill it with something we know is good for you. IRS: Thanks for getting your milk witholding correct this year. National news media: Hey, we wanted OJ!

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