1 A Milley’s Diary of thoughts part 3
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Dear piece of paper,
I’ve only been here for a couple of days and it really feels like I live here. I am not getting on with Fiona at all. She’s called me a tramp, a tart and a flirt. Yes of course I have to be nice to Jonny he let me stay for free, eat his food and he is gentle and kind. I nearly had a fight with Fiona because I used her shampoo, how pathetic. She is jealous that I am cooking and cleaning in her flat. She thinks I have made a right mess of my life and said I was fooling myself thinking I could sing. She called me pathetic and said I’d look better if I did something with my dull black hair and didn’t have that monstrosity on my mouth. Yet all these put downs are so correct aren’t they I am ugly but no improvement will change my beauty ever. She isn’t so wonderful herself if I was a dumb blonde like she is I’d sue the bleach company. Beauty isn’t everything she is just so misguided by that dreaded thing called fashion. There is no way on earth 400 pounds for a miniskirt is simply a waste of money, I’d never buy it.
May 15th
Dear brand new Diary,
I’ve been having such a brilliant time apart from my illness but I don’t think about the bad. Fiona’s just going to have to put up with my ways. I got some money to buy myself a few things. I got myself a new diary another tattoo and the usual. However I’ve never been late before. I’ll try not to get too stressed out though. I feel like Jonny is mine not Fiona’s. Ever since I’ve been here I don’t think that they’ve been right. He told me that they weren’t getting on very well and that she isn’t even getting married to him. Well she’s a dreamer just like me I suppose. Anyway Fiona’s been away at her Mum’s because her mum is sick. During the past couple of days we’ve fallen for each other. I shared the bed with him last night and it was for comfort because we were both so lonely. He told me I will be able to sing one day despite everyone else’s nasty comments. I’d be starting my exam study leave soon. I still worry about Matt and Jo I had been a nasty bitch to them. I’ definitely going back home not just yet, I could get used to this life.
May 16th
Dear Diary,
Well how do I start to explain how I’m feeling? First I woke up to a shouting Fiona accusing me of seducing her precious Jonny. Then we have the largest physical fight, she kicked me right in the stomach with her pointy toed stiletto boot. The rest is a soap not real life. You should’ve seen the row between Fiona and Jonny. He threw her stuff out of the window and told her to never come back. He’d just been waiting to discover what a violent woman he could’ve ended up with. She hates me but I hate being the reason they spilt up. Then I had the worst pain in my stomach. It felt like I had been stabbed. I screamed so Jonny took me to the hospital to get examined. The doctor gave me the most surprising news ever. I sat there and cried my eyes out. He told me that I was two months pregnant at least but how? I’ve been so careful with Matt haven’t I? Then they had to give me a check to see the baby was still alive but luckily the only damage seemed to be to my digestive system. I was told to rest and if I was having any further trouble not to hesitate to come back for a check up. I can’t believe it though I’m having a baby, I’m still a child. That’s it now my career is never going to be singing. I’ll have to go and take my exams and get an education. Jonny will understand I will need to go soon. How will I break the news to everyone? Yes I know Jonny’s been kind to me and said he’d support me and the baby but he shouldn’t be responsible I need Matt and my dad’s help.
May 21st
Dear Diary,
Well I’m back now and settled at home. I’m catching up with the work I’d refused to do so I have little time to write in here, I’m busy. They figured they’d send me the wrok home as soon as I refused to set foot in the school again. I really have learned my lesson, I need to work hard and listen to advice in the future. As for the little one inside me I haven’t given Matt the news yet, in fact I’m pretty worried. I’m going back to school for the last week I really want to make it up to Matt and Jo, I really wasn’t myself. I had been a selfish Milley and here’s my punishment for it. As for bands, the roses should carry on without me. I’m glad Julie joined now, her voice is good too. I couldn’t care less about James. I’m not going to buy his album ever I hope Jonny’s ok. I am going to email him every day
These are purely fictional. It is part of my novel, however I wanted to share it with others. I'm 16 and called Stephanie Southwell I'm from England. I hope you enjoyed my story. Thanks for reading.
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