A Comparison of Windows 95 to Jesus Christ

Rating: PG
Quality: (Quality: Unrated)

If you have half a brain, you can't help but notice the throng of publications, analists and net users declaring Windows 95 the Saviour of the Computer Industry. If you have less than half a brain, you probably believe it. Could it be? 
Let's compare Windows 95 against a widely-accepted Saviour, Jesus of Nazareth:


        Jesus                                   Windows 95
--------------------------------------+--------------------------
Said, "Surely I come quickly."        |  Has been promised "any day
                                      |  now."
                                      |
Is taking a lot longer to actually    |  Is taking a lot longer to
arrive                                |   actually arrive.
                                      |
Can walk on water.                    |  Can crawl on a 486.
                                      |
Sits in judgement at the pearly gates.|  Will be used to judge Bill
                                      |  Gates.
                                      |
Bible says, "In Him, all things are   |  Windows 95 doesn't even
possible."                            |  run all possible Windows
                                      |  apps.
                                      |
Started life as a carpenter.          |  Turns perfectly good
                                      |  computers into furniture.
                                      |
Born in a manger.                     |  Resembles something found
                                      |  in a barn.
                                      |
Remembered for protecting the weak.   |  Has weak memory
                                      |  protection.
                                      |
Was raised from the dead.             |  Was created from Windows
                                      |  3.1.
                                      |
Jesus performed great works for       |  Windows 95 multitasking
the multitudes                        |  performance barely works.
                                      |
Jesus has no sin.                     |  Windows 95 has no shame.
                                      |
--------------------------------------+--------------------------

You decide.


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