Job Titles

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Quality: (Quality: Unrated)

A statistician is someone who is good with numbers, but lacks the personality to be an accountant. An actuary is someone who brings a fake bomb on a plane because that decreases the chances that there will be another bomb on the plane. (Laurence J. Peter) A programmer is someone who solves a problem you didn't know you had in a way you don't understand. A mathematician is a blind man in a dark room looking for a black cat which isn't there. (Charles R. Darwin) A topologist is a man who doesn't know the difference between a coffee cup and a doughnut. A lawyer is a person who writes a 10,000-word document and calls it a "brief." (Franz Kafka) A psychologist is a man who watches everyone else when a beautiful girl enters the room. A professor is one who talks in someone else's sleep. A schoolteacher is a disillusioned woman who used to think she liked children. A consultant is someone who takes the watch off your wrist and tells you the time.

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