f heart break :( I HATE PLAYAS

Religious

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There was this guy, ryan, and i had known him since i was 4 or 5.. our parents were friends and i often saw him at bbqs and partys that our parents had.. we used to get along really well, play the play station, talk, muck around. we never liked each other more then friends growing up. one day when we were about 11 our parents had a fight and i didnt see him for a long time.. then my parents other friends invited us to a party and i went.. and to my surprise ryans parents had been invited too.. and ryan was there.(we were about 13 at this time) well anyway. me and him didnt talk too much after not seeing each other for a while.. we were both a bit shy. but then we ended up talkin a tiny bit and he asked for my msn. the next night he messaged me and we talked for ever. he seemed just as nice as he did when i was 5. he told me that i looked really pretty and stuff which kind of got me thinking.. we had both grown up and looked a lot differant to what we did before and i started to like him back.. he asked me for my phone number so i gave it to him and he used to ring me every night and we would talk for hours.. then he asked me out but i wanted to be sure.. i didnt want to be hurt so i didnt answer straight away.. anyway then the next day he had "i love amy" on his msn name.. and i asked him who she was and he told me it was his new gf.. it really hurt but i got over it soon enough and moved on. a few weeks later.. he invited me over his house and my friend shannalee and her boyfriend gavin were going too because gavin is ryans best friend. so we all went and had fun watchin tv n playin music n talkin.
then ryan called that night and asked me out but gavin told me ryan was still with amy.. so i told him i would if he wansnt goin out with her. so he called her and dumped her.. and i said yes.. i knew it was a bad thing to do but i liked him too much..
anyway. he continued calling me every night and i was going over his house nearly every day.
we got really close.. we used to lay on his bed together and talk for hours..i felt like i could tell him anything
he tried to kiss me.. but i didnt want to at that moment in case that was all he wanted.. i wanted to know he was going to respect me. anyway. after that day i went away on holidays for 4 days.. in those 4 days he didnt ring me so i got worried.. i called him one night and he seemed really distant... i asked him what was wrong and he told me he thinks we should just be friends.. it really hurt.. i hung up.. and he never gave me a reason. he comes on msn sometimes and i say hi but he never answers.. just had to type it to make me feel better...

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