1 Dumb Jock Test
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According to experts exercise of the brain is as important as exercise of the muscles.
Seeing as the majority of recipients of this email are athletes it is doubtful that they spend near as much time working their brains as they do their muscles. This test was developed to either prove or disprove the "dumb jock" theory. It has since been declassified and has become a novelty email forward.
This is a very private way to gauge your loss or non-loss of
intelligence.
Take the following test and determine just how "in shape" your noggin is
OK, relax, clear your mind and.... Begin.
1. What do you put in a toaster?
Answer: "bread." If you said "toast," then give up now and go do something else. Try not to hurt yourself.
If you said, "bread," go to Question 2.
2. Say "silk" five times..... Now spell "silk."
What do cows drink?
Answer: Cows drink water dummy. If you said "milk," please do not attempt the next question or argue the fact that calves drink milk, you must come to grips with your condition. Your brain is obviously over stressed and may evenoverheat.
If you said "water," proceed to Question 3.
3. Twenty years ago, a plane was flying at 20,000 feet over Germany.
If you recall, Germany at the time was politically divided into West Germany
and East Germany. During the flight, TWO of the engines failed. The pilot, realizing that the last remaining engine is also failing, decides on a crash landing procedure. Unfortunately the third engine fails before he has time to attempt an emergency landing, and the plane crashes smack in the middle of "no man's land" between East Germany and West Germany. Where would you bury the survivors? .. in East Germany or West Germany or in "no man's land"?
Answer: You don't, of course, bury survivors. If you said ANYTHING else,you
are a real dunce and you must NEVER try to rescue anyone from a plane crash.
Your efforts would NOT be appreciated.
If you said, "Don't bury the survivors," proceed to the next question.
4. If a red house is made from red bricks, and a blue house is made
from blue bricks, and a pink house is made from pink bricks and a black
house is made from black bricks, what is a green house made from?
Answer: Greenhouses are made from glass or plastic. If you said, "green bricks" what the devil are you still doing reading these questions?
If you said "glass," then go on to Question 4.
5. If the hour hand on a clock moves 1/60 of a degree every minute how many degrees will the hour hand move in one hour?
Answer: One degree. If you said anything other than one degree," you are to be congratulated on getting this far, but you are obviously out of your league. Turn in your pencil, and exit the room.
Everyone else proceed to the final question.
6. Without using a calculator --- You are driving a tour bus from Washington DC to Williamsburg, VA. In Washington DC, 17 people get on the bus. In Boston,
six people get off the bus, and nine people get on. In Philadelphia, two people get
off and four get on. In Gettysburg, 11 people get off and 16 people get on. In Jamestown, three people get off and five people get on. In Yorktown,
six people get off and three get on. You then arrive at Williamsburg.
What was the name of the bus driver?
Answer: Oh, for crying out loud Don't you remember? It was YOU
So still not convinced that you are a dumb jock? well, diagnosed athletes quickly begin to notice symptoms such as over indulgences in gatorade, need for new equipment even when their current shoes will suffice, and the constant analogy of every event in life to their chosen sport. Sound familiar???
So what can be done for you? Well, take comfort in knowing that so long as NBA players are skipping college and heading for the pros, professional soccer players leave the states to play in Europe, football players are memorizing plays instead of the periodic table of elements, and cheerleading is in the most remote respect considered a sport---there is no cure.
In order to prevent further spread of the disease please provide any and all athletes you know with this email.
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