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Badtimes Virus
Rating:
Quality: (Quality: Unrated)
Warning: If you receive an e-mail entitled "Badtimes,"
delete it immediately. Do not open it. Apparently this
one is pretty nasty. It will not only erase everything
on your hard drive, but it will also delete anything
on disks within 20 feet of your computer. It
demagnetizes the stripes on ALL of your credit cards.
It reprograms your ATM access code, screws up the
tracking on your VCR and uses subspace field harmonics
to scratch any CD's you attempt to play. It will
program your phone auto dial to call only 900 numbers.
This virus will mix antifreeze into your fish tank. It
will drink ALL your beer.
FOR GOD'S SAKE, ARE YOU LISTENING? ! ! ! !
It will leave dirty underwear on the coffee table when
you are expecting company. It will replace your
shampoo with Nair and your Nair with Rogaine, all the
while dating your current boy/girlfriend behind your
back and billing their hotel rendezvous to your Visa
card. It will cause you to run with scissors and throw
things in a way that is only fun until someone loses
an eye. It will rewrite your backup files, changing
all your active verbs to passive tense and
incorporating undetectable misspellings which grossly
change the interpretations of key sentences.
If the "Badtimes" message is opened in a Windows 95/98
environment, it will leave the toilet seat up and
leave your hair dryer plugged in dangerously close to
a full bathtub. It will not only remove the forbidden
tags from your mattresses and pillows, it will also
refill your skim milk with whole milk.
**WARN AS MANY PEOPLE AS YOU CAN**
And if you don't send this to 5000 people in 20
seconds you'll fart so hard that your right leg will
spasm and shoot straight out in front of you, sending
sparks that will ignite the person nearest you.
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