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Media editors at work (actual headlines and subheadlines): Children's Stool Great for Use in Garden Stud Tires Out Stiff Opposition to Casketless Funeral Plan Drunk Gets Nine Months in Violin Case Iraqi Head Seeks Arms Queen Mary Having Bottom Scraped Columnist Gets Urologist in Trouble with His Peers New Housing For Elderly Not Yet Dead New Missouri U. Chancellor Expects Little Sex 12 On Their Way to Cruise Among Dead in Plane Crash N.J. Judge to Rule on Nude Beach Chou Remains Cremated Chinese Apeman Dated Hershey Bars Protest Deer Kill 130,000 Complaints About NBA Referees Growing Ugly Squad Helps Dog Bite Victim Man Eating Piranha Mistakenly Sold As Pet Fish Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant Something went wrong in jet crash, experts say Police begin campaign to run down jaywalkers Safety Experts say school bus passengers should be belted Survivor of Siamese twins joins parents Farmer Bill dies in house Is there a ring of debris around Uranus? Prostitutes appeal to Pope Panda mating fails; veterinarian takes over British left waffles on Falkland Islands Eye drops off shelf Teacher strikes idle kids Shot off woman's leg helps Nicklaus to 66 Enraged cow injures farmer with ax Plane too close to ground, crash probe told Miners refuse to work after death Stolen painting found by tree Two soviet ships collide, one dies 2 sisters reunited after 18 years in checkout counter Never withhold herpes infection from loved one If strike isn't settled quickly, it may last a while Enfiels couple slain; Police suspect homicide Two cars were reported stolen by the Groveton police yesterday. We will sell gasoline to anyone in a glass container.

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