Rules for Visiting Rhode Island
follow these simple rules whenever you are in Rhode Island:
Quality: (Quality: Unrated)
(as told by a Cranstonian)
1. first of all, there are stop signs at every possible location and you will come to one at least every 15 seconds, so 'coming to a complete stop' means vaguely slowing down, then speeding up to full speed again immediately
2. If you need a coffee, but accidentally just passed a Dunkin' Donuts, dont worry and dont turn around, you will pass another one in about 20 seconds
3. no one presses the crosswalk buttons cuz they need them, most people just run across the street at random places, if it doz get pressed, either the person is old, or its just bored teenagers who think its funny that you hafta sit and wait for no reason
4. try not to hit the people running across the street at random places... however, u may hit the annoying teenagers who pressed the crosswalk buttons while they walk along the sidewalk
5. RIPTA busses dont make noises when theyre approaching from behind, so be careful while walkin in the street (just think of that scene from Final Destination)... but for some reason the bussed are very loud when theyre in front of you
6. Most Rhode Islanders have mastered steering with their knees while drinkin a coffee in one hand and holdin a doughnut in the other
7. NEVER try to park at Providence Place Mall... sure its easy to find a parking space, but it's usually on the 8th level and takes a few hours to actually get out
8. 'No Turn on Red' signs are just there to remind you to turn while the light is red
9. if coming out of the parking at a P. Bruins game, it is customary to beep along to whatever song everyone else is beeping
10. no matter where you are goin, there is always a way there using backroads
11. wait til the last possible second to turn on your blinker and turn down a street
12. occasionally dont use ur blinker - see how many people you can piss off
13. when driving in roger williams park, make sure u have good traction...there are alot of twists and turns
14. unless you grew up near roger williams park, you are most likely going to get lost in it
15. While looking for a parking space, if the entire lot is full, just wait behind a car that looks like it could be leaving soon
16. You must look at the Big Blue Bug whenever you pass it
17. Fire trucks and police cars go by every 5 mins, so you may not get anywhere too quick
18. When in doubt, find Park Ave and you'll never b lost
19. Be careful where you leave your car in Providence
20. Always Pahk ya cah in the pahkin laht
21. There is always road work going on
22. No one likes to let you go in front of them
23. Green means 'go' yellow means 'speed up, you just might make it' and red means 'eh, stop if ya feel like it'
24. If you're at the front, and the light turns green, go asap, or else every car behind you will get aggravated
25. if you are behind someone and the light turns green, get aggravated at them if they dont go asap
26. the dancing cop usually stops traffic more than he directs it
27. Warick and Wawick both mean Warwick
28. if you are lost, and start to notice that people are holding their "a"s a bit long, you know ur in Craaaaaaaaanston
29. if you're out in the stix, be sure to say hi to the cows
30. Drive over to Newport Creamery and order a "wicked big sundae w/ jimmies" then ask where the bubbla is (dont worry, you didnt say anything bad)
31. You hafta eat at Applebee's,... after lookin at the walls u'll learn alot about RI
32. dont wear a green thunderbolt in west cranston
32. dont wear a red falcon in east cranston
33. Keep snow boots, an umbrella, a jacket, a bathing suit, and sunscreen handy at all times...the weather could change in an instant
34. Dont swim in Budlong pool... thats just gross
35. go quahogging
36. go to rocky point... theres no park anymore, but there's chowder and clam cakes
37. Dont eat anything that came from Almacs
38. Memorize the jingles from Newport Grand and Foxwoods commercials....everyone else has
39. Dont light a match in CHSE...chances are there's a gas leak and you'll blow up
40. Dont pronounce your 'r's... say 'ah' instead
41. drink Del's lemonade
42. Learn to sail
43. Rhode Island is not an island
44. when saying Rhode Island, pronounce it "Rhoe Die-Lan"
45. you cannot cheer for both URI and PC in basketball... it just doznt work
46. 'P-Pack' (PPAC) is the Prov. Performing Arts Center... not a pack of pee
47. If you dont know why we celebrate Gaspee Day, its ok, alotta people dont, but hey, theres a parade :)
48. If you start seeing places that look like paint was thrown on them, or melted, or just draw on, its ok... it just means ur near RISD (RI School of Design)
49. Rhode Island Red is the state ...uhh... Rooster.. the Big Blue Bug is the state insect
50. No matter what the Park Cinema says, it will NOT be open in the spring... its been like that for about the past year or so
51. Garden City is not a city....or a garden
52. most directions start with "first, you get on I-95..."
53. Most people cant pronounce half the places in RI
54. If you dont drink coffee or eat seafood, then leave now, cuz its pointless to b in RI
55. bring something to do with you.... it gets very boring here
Submitted by 35
Print this forward
Rate this forward:
Bored.com - Tons of fun stuff to do when you are bored.
MakeWebsites.com - Free tools for creating your own website.
LifeBets.com - Win a $100 prize by correctly predicting real life events.
Free Stuff For Teens - Teen Freebies: video games, cd's, magazines, contests, beauty products, posters, and more. Only lists free offers that don't have minimum age requirements.
SearchCactus.com - A search engine where you get $2.00 for signing up, $0.02 a search, and 25% of the earnings for anyone you refer. You are also entered to win $50,000 or a Porsche. Must be at least 13 years old and a U.S. resident.
Adoptme.com - Adopt a virtual pet.
Digitalfilms.com - Make your own movie online for free
GetVitamins.com - Choose from over 12,000 vitamins, herbs, and nutritional products
CheapFlowers.com - Buy flowers online for $29.95 with no extra delivery charge or other fees.