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George Carlin's View on Aging
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> > George Carlin's View on Aging
> >
> > Do you realize that the only time in
> > our lives when we like to get old is when we're
> > kids? If you're less than 10 years old, you're
> > so excited about aging that you think in
> > fractions. "How old are you?" "I'm four and a half"
> > You're never thirty-six and a half. You're four
> > and a half, going on five That's the key.
> >
> > You get into your teens, now they can't hold you
> > back. You jump to the next number, or even a few
> > ahead. "How old are you?" "I'm gonna be 16"
> > You could be 13, but hey, you're gonna be 16
> >
> > And then the greatest day of your life . . you
> > become 21. Even the words sound like a ceremony .
> > . . YOU BECOME 21. . YESSSS
> >
> > But then you turn 30. Oooohh, what happened there? Makes
> > you sound like bad milk. He TURNED, we had to
> > throw him out. There's no fun now, you're just a
> > sour-dumpling. What's wrong? What's changed?
> > You BECOME 21, you TURN 30, then you're PUSHING 40.
> > Whoa Put on the brakes, it's all slipping away.
> > Before you know it, you REACH 50 . . . and
> > your dreams are gone.
> >
> > But wait You MAKE it to 60. You didn't think you would
> > So you BECOME 21, TURN 30, PUSH 40, REACH 50 and MAKE it to 60.
> > You've built up so much speed that you HIT 70
> > After that it's a day-by-day thing; you HIT
> > Wednesday You get into your 80s and every day
> > is a complete cycle; you HIT lunch; you TURN
> > 4:30; you REACH bedtime. And it doesn't end
> > there. Into the 90s, you start going backwards; "I was
> > JUST 92." Then a strange thing happens. If
> > you make it over 100, you become a little kid
> > again. "I'm 100 and a half"
> >
> > May you all make it to a healthy 100 and a half
> >
> > HOW TO STAY YOUNG;
> > 1. Throw out nonessential numbers. This
> > includes age, weight and height. Let the doctor
> > worry about them. That is why you pay him/her.
> >
> > 2. Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches pull you
> > down.
> >
> > 3. Keep learning. Learn more about the
> > computer, crafts, gardening, whatever. Never let
> > the brain idle. " An idle mind is the devil's
> > workshop." And the devil's name is Alzheimer's.
> >
> > 4. Enjoy the simple things.
> >
> > 5. Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath.
> >
> > 6. The tears happen. Endure, grieve, and move
> > on. The only person who is with us our entire
> > life, is ourselves. Be ALIVE while you are alive.
> >
> > 7. Surround yourself with what you love, whether
> > it's family, pets, keepsakes, music, plants,
> > hobbies, whatever.Your home is your refuge.
> >
> > 8. Cherish your health: If it is good, preserve it. If it
> > is unstable, improve it. If it is beyond what you
> > can improve, get help.
> >
> > 9. Don't take guilt trips. Take a trip to the mall, to the
next county,
>to
> > a foreign country, but NOT to where the guilt is.
> >
> > 10. Tell the people you love that you love
> > them, at every opportunity.
> >
> > AND ALWAYS REMEMBER: Life is not measured by the number
> > of breaths we take, but by the moments that take
> > our breath away.
Jerri- I'd rather be at the beach.
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